Creations

i am so sorry that i haven’t posted in a while. life just got really busy and stressful. since my fish died i got another and it died in 2 days because it was sick when i bought it which just hurt me even more. while all of that was going on i was still trying to find a job but i just didnt want to get out of bed. but now i have a new pet named Fish, he is a hamster. he is great, i think i really needed a pet i could play with and have fun with because since i got him ive been alot better. i found a summer job at a restaurant and im doing okay. i just really dont enjoy summer. i dont like being home. being home just reminds me of all the bad things that happened when i was in high school and i just feel the negative energy.
anyone who goes to college is finally feels better but everything goes backwards when you get home tell me what you do to feel better… i painted my room i got a pet i tried everything… i just dont know what to do. i do what i have to and then i just stay in my room. i hate going outside in my town. i miss the ocean and the water and i need to go back to school and be able to walk to the water. everyone has their safe place, and mine is the water. and so going to the beach in ct really doesnt cut it when i spend my school year in RI on the water. nothing will ever compare to what i see when at school. so i go to work and then i go home and sleep most of the time. i dont do much else unless im with my boyfriend, he gets me out of the house and now we are playing pokemon go. anyone with depression… this is a great game. it makes me want to go outside because i can find things and it makes me feel good when i find things and see all different people doing this it is great. so anyone with depression try getting the app you can start by going around your neighborhood and working your way from there it is great when it comes to having a hard day.
last thing i wanted to talk about was a mental health training i did yesterday and will be doing again next tuesday. it is just to help people in a mental health crisis until a doctor or a specialist can get to them. i went because first i want to be able to help others because i know i know a lot about mental illness but i never know if what i am saying to help the person is right because although i might feel better if someone said it they might not. and second, i am going to see if i can learn anything helpful for me. i struggle in helping myself. i always need someone to help me. i am always the person calling a friend because i can not do things on my own and it really bothers me that i have to do that so i thought going to this training will help me help myself but also other people. being able to share my story with these people i think may have helped them understand how much of an impact they are making if they do help people with mental illness. i didnt really have anyone when i was young ask me if i was okay or needed help because it was looked at very negativity i think now people are starting to understand that we just need help and support and we can live pretty normal lives. but without help and support i know first hand that mental illnesses just get worse and worse.
again i am so sorry i havent been around in awhile i havent been in the best place. knowing i have to support of all of you helps me alot. thank you all so much!!!